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Rock Maze

Missive of the moment 28/3/20

Good morning Facebook chums

Missive of the moment

What is it we miss?

This social distancing and being responsible gives us time to really evaluate those things that are most important. And those things we really miss.

As time goes on no doubt some needs and desires may fade and deminish while others will become more acute.

Take a jar of roasted red peppers or kitchen wipes or self raising flour or frozen raspberries. It was irritating that I couldn't find them in Tesco's yesterday but not really important. (Toilet roll on the other hand, that would be a different matter).

Anyway back to my original question. What is it that we really miss?


That's it HUGS are one thing I really miss. Now it's easy to say but consider it a minute.

Who do you get your HUGS from? I get mine from Tricia obviously. I also get them from my grandchildren and fabulous they are too, I get them from my daughters, I get them from my family (not all), I get them from friends and sometimes I unexpectedly get them from people I barely know or people I've not seen in ages.

So what's special about HUGS?

Well for a start they're free and they're easy to learn how to give and the best part is that they are a non-pharmacological, non-invasive, universal expression of love and care. When you give a HUG the person receiving the HUG gets a silent message, “You matter to me, you are not alone, I’m here.”

And of course a HUG gives back because we cannot hug someone without getting one in return. Hugs are without a doubt a win, win thing where both of us get the benefit.

Now I've alerted you to the power of HUGS think of those who need a HUG now and let them know that when all this isolation is over to brace themselves because a HUG is on it's way.

I was brought up in a not very touchy feely way. So as a young boy I don't think I learnt the art of HUGGING. I have 4 brothers I can't remember HUGGING any of them. I think my dad towards the end of his life, although a generally happy man, experienced a HUG deficit.

When I think of my family and friends I know those who give good HUGS. Don't get me wrong all HUGS are good. But some are especially good HUGS.

So that got me to thinking how come some HUGS are good and some HUGS are excellent life affirming HUGS.

Well here's a few pointers on how to:-

Give a Good HUG

1. Aim to HUG someone for at least 20 seconds – don’t be a pussy – make it a good bear HUG to show how much you care. (Stop. Count 20 seconds.......It's a long time)

2. Develop a good technique Raise your left arm and lower your right arm to wrap around his or her middle this gives the best “Heart to Heart HUG”:

3. Give and receive HUGS whenever you can. Some people say we need 4 HUGS a day for survival, 8 HUGS a day for maintenance and 12 HUGS a day for growth.

4. If you have pets include them in your daily prescription of 4, 8 or 12 HUGS a day – all HUGS count!


5. If you are not sure if someone is a HUGGER, a nice pat on the back or rub on the hand or arm will let you know if you should go for it. If not, the touch is still a nice gesture of support and not invading the recipient’s space.

When this horrible situation has come to an end I'm making it my mission to find all of you that have sent me verbal, virtual HUGS and I'm coming to collect!

So use this time wisely. Learn the art of HUGGING.

Until tomorrow.


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