50 posts and still a dunce.

When I impart my nuggets of wisdom Tricia is oft heard to say "Neil, you're just full of shit". Well this is my 50th post, so now you know, she's right, but one thing that’s taken me by surprise is just how much! I’m also surprised how easy it is. I just sit at a keyboard and bash away with all my finger. So is writing about writing a bit meta? It maybe, but one thing I know is, I’m not usually without something to say. Mostly it’s true and full of interesting “nuggets". Sometimes it’s just a load of old tosh. You decide.

The thing is, one thing I've learnt from back in the dark ages when I taught for a living was, "say it like you mean it". If you say something with enough conviction people will believe it. Poor Abbi suffered a bit when I used to muck around with words as the girls were growing up. If we caught an insect or any other sort of creepy crawly. I would say we were buggers, the correct word for bug catchers. Imagine the giggles. I also said to the girls when the opportunity presented itself the phrase “not nececelery” instead of “not necessarily”. The girls believed their dad, Abbi still finds herself saying it. She's 27.

If I told you about the time when me and the CEO of Sainsburys were both invited to the Palace of Westminster or when Rhodri Morgan, when he was First Minister of Wales, invited me to Dinner or that Poplar, the home of "Call the Midwife" was where Alex Scott, Dizzee Rascal and my paternal grandmother went to school, you may not believe me. Those sorts of claims I would need to be backed up either with evidence or l just need to say it with conviction. They all may be true but not nececelery. I'll tell you the truth at the end.

We're in an orchard just near Exminster writing this while Gogglebox is on the Gogglebox. I don't think that's meta. I actually think I need to get a better handle on TV viewing. We're in this orchard for a couple of nights in our motorhome. While we're here we thought IKEA might be a good idea. I'm beginning to wonder if our ideas are any good at all!

Now, as I mentioned in my last post l bought a new mobile phone yesterday. I keep my mobile in a case that's also useful for keeping my assorted bank / credit / membership cards in. In my case, I'm at a heightened risk of sepsis, so I have this card I need to carry with me at all times. It's called a Neutropenic Sepsis Alert Card. It reads " If they present with fever >39° OR temp <36° AT ANY TIME" administer a stat dose of antibiotics immediately. DO NOT WAIT FOR BLOOD RESULTS OR MEDICAL ASSESSMENT. I have another card that explains my "power injectable port". I need to carry it at all times. I have yet another card that's my "24 HOUR TELEPHONE ADVICE LINE" that also warns about sepsis.

What a scary bunch of cards. If you want to play "Top Trumps" with the random cards in your wallet I think I might win.

So at the moment I have a new phone without a case and a case without a phone. And a perfectly serviceable wallet. So how do I bring my set of emergency cards? In my old phone case of course! What a dunce!!

So far the latest news about our forthcoming walk is we've raised, with gift aid, £247.50. Flippin ace!

If you haven't donated, and you want to, go to www.justgiving.com/fundraising/cornwallwalkstogether and do the biz.

If you want to walk and haven't decided then have a look at the route at

https://www.plotaroute.com/route/1302081?units=miles

And, if my situation isn't a good enough reason to donate to Bowel Cancer UK then have a look here. https://www.memoriesofmarty.co.uk (The original inspiration for this walk).

So were my claims true? Was I invited to the Palace of Westminster to the same event as the CEO of Sainsburys? Yes I was. Did I have dinner with Rhodri Morgan? Yes l did. Did my paternal grandmother go to school in Poplar? Surprisingly, yes she did, but don’t believe everything I say, well not nececelery!!

N x